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Help! I have nothing to wear!

Yes. That is a photo of my closet and, believe it or not, I was uttering those famous words just the other day.

You see, it was a special occasion. My oldest and closest friend - the best man at my wedding and the godfather to our son - was dropping by and meeting Corinne for the first time. So I needed to look and feel my best. I needed to be... Fabulous!

Normally, I do not have much of an issue putting an outfit together. Super casual t-shirt and shorts…Check! Business dress with a blouse and pencil skirt…Easy. Fun and flirty sundress… Got it! Sequined cocktail dress…No problem! I mean obviously I am something of a clothes horse.

But on this day, I could not be too flirty, too business-like or too casual. I needed it to be just right as I was – for the first time outside of my wife and therapist – merging my two worlds… That of Corinne and that of David.

The good news is, that after an hour of frantic closet searching, I managed to pull it off. A knee-length denim skirt, peasant top and some cute sandals. Enough to say this is a real woman without going over-the-top.

First of all, my friend said I looked great and then he gave me a big hug! Then we spent a solid four hours reminiscing about old times, learning about my trans status and talking about our families. Better yet… My friend was totally cool with the real me. He knows who I am and supports me. Plus he is secure enough in his own emotions and life that he did not feel threatened or scared. I now feel closer to him than ever and cannot wait to share my true self with more friends as I move ahead.

For Trans Women It Is Not About The Clothes…It Is About Being Genuine

Like all trans women, I know that I am much more than my outward appearance. I am the sum of all of my experiences. I have a woman’s soul and brain. I care about others and I advocate for trans people whenever I get the opportunity. I am an employer. I am a spouse and I am a father.

But for that one day I needed to put on some armor (even if it was a skirt and heels). And for four hours the old saying “It is the clothes that make the woman” really applied, because my clothes gave me the confidence to be who I really am with one of the people who matters most in my life.

And to celebrate….I went shopping!

Would you like to write for our transgender blog or learn more about our support group for transgender people in the Lehigh Valley and eastern Pennsylvania? If so, please contact Lehigh Valley Renaissance or better yet join us at one of our monthly meetings!

The opinions in this article are those of the author and not necessarily that of Lehigh Valley Renaissance.

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